James 1: 23-24 says: Anyone who listens to the word but does not do what it says is like someone who looks at their face in a mirror and, after looking at themselves, goes away and immediately forgets what they looks like.
My partner and I are ordained ministers and we are regularly asked to lead worship in various settings. Neither one of us wears a clergy collar unless we are doing something specifically related to work. Even as a hospice chaplain, my partner only wears her collar when she is going in to interact with patients and families. This is not, in my mind, a statement of superiority but merely a reflection of the role that we are playing at that moment. If you like, as much of a reminder to myself of my calling and what I am doing there.
We also have a young daughter who is, like most toddlers, active and time consuming. So this morning when I was getting myself ready for church I took my time a little doing the things that I am not always able to do daily due to life circumstances. Things like choosing jewellery to wear and spending time putting my shoulder length hair up in a more imaginative way than the 'mum bun'. I put a little make up on and then put my collar into my clergy shirt. I got out the shoes that have become my 'church shoes' simply by virtue of the fact that the rest of the time I can't be bothered to put anything on but trainers and I looked at myself in the mirror.
I thought this morning about the image that looked back at me and what others must think or feel when they look at me. I am not yet 40, I am not thin, average body weight, 5ft 7inches with shoulder length hair. I put a small piece of plastic in my shirt collar and whatever anyone saw before says something suddenly very different. I know that many people, consciously or subconsciously will react to what they are seeing when I wear a dog collar, for some the reaction is negative, for others it is positive. What amuses me most is those times I go out and completely forget I look like a vicar and I do something everyday. Today was one of those days, I went to a large supermarket, just to grab some carrots for dinner (no I'm not the 'shopping on Sunday is a sin' kind of Christian) and I got what we needed and went to the checkout. It was pretty mundane really but I notice that people look at me differently, react to me differently. I've had folk apologise for swearing or using profanities, mostly people talk to me less when out and about even though I chat to people a lot, many seem less keen to engage when I am wearing my collar, more wary I guess. And yet others feel the need to tell me they are Christians too and what church they attend and what parish am I with? "I am an independent, Progressive minister", "Oh right, what is that?" I have no idea what they make of my explanation most of the time but this doesn't trouble me.
This day got me thinking about that verse that I opened with, anyone who listens to the word and then does nothing with it is like when I look at myself in the mirror, knowing what I look like to others and go out and immediately forget what I look like to those around me. Who I am when I wear my collar is not something that I can turn on and off, it is part of who I am, but it does change how other people react and engage with me and comes with an extra responsibility to those people, especially those who have been hurt or damaged by the often abusive nature of supposedly Christian folk.
For me, hearing the word means being true to what I feel God has spoken into my life. To love others without exception, to care for those in need, to do all I can to make my community better, to fight for those who cannot fight for themselves and to try to find a way to make God accessible to people in new and challenging ways. Just as importantly though, to make sure of that for myself, that I am constantly reminded of these things and that God makes God's self apparent in my life in new and exciting ways, always growing me, always changing how I think about and view the world so that when I look at myself in the mirror I always see myself in new ways with new challenges.
How often do you look in the mirror and think about the reflection that is looking back at you? How often do we consider what we put on affects what we do with our day? Perhaps you are in a role that involves a uniform? A nurse or a fire-fighter? A janitor or a supermarket operative? But perhaps you are not in a job with a specific uniform, a teacher perhaps or a carer. Perhaps you have a disability and your role is getting through each day, or like me, a parent too.
Our jewellery, tattoos, everything about us tells a small part of our story and we cannot help how people look at and react to us, but we can try and remember how it was when we looked in the mirror, when we were called to be who we are in this world and make the best of it.
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